Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Charolette's Web
If I was Charolette, I would have written Wilbur a secret message in my web. I would be the big cheese of a spy organization. Wilbur would be our best agent, and I could trust only him with this top-secret mission. He would accept, and we would fly him first-class to Guatemala, where he would have to single-handedly take down a drug lord named Chekov, who has a bit too much power for his own good. He's Russian and has set up a secret cocaine smuggling system within Guatemala. We have a sleeper agent there that can sneak him into the country. He would then infiltrate their compound and plant explosives at the "drug stash." He would then sneak into Chekov's bedroom, only to find that he's been expecting him. Wilbur will attack him and they will get into a violent hand-to-hand combat scene. Chekov's winning. Then Wilbur. Then Chekov. After Chekov's had a good beating, Wilbur will demand who his supplier is and punch him in the face. Chekov will mutter about an old friend named Dimitri in Russia and how he's the brains of the operation. As he's talking, Checkov reaches for a hidden knife in his boot. He pulls it out and attempts to stab Wilbur. Wilbur thinks quickly, blocks him, twists his arm causing him to drop the knife, and throws him through a glass widow. Chekov falls ten stories to his death. Wilbur has all the information he needs. The alarm goes off when the guards find his body. Wilbur makes a dead sprint up the stairs to the roof of the 30 story building. He gets to the top to find there are guards. He's in a shoot-out. He's taking heavy fire. He blows up the cocaine stash, which causes the guard to turn around. Now's his chance. He makes a run for the edge. He jumps off with the sound of gunfire behind him and deploys his parachute! He sails off to where his getaway car is hidden. That's what I'd write in my web if I were Charolette.
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Chuck Norris